Tub 1 of Laughs
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Here are some funny stories:
#1183
My favorite story about being pulled over came from a former colleague’s husband (a police officer) who stopped a speeding student in Upstate NY. The young man pulled out his wallet, flicked it open like a Star Trek communicator and said, “Beam me up, Scottie. I’m in trouble here.” The officer got such a chuckle out of it that he let the student go with just a warning.
#1184
My husband was driving my car back from a meeting in the evening. I had neglected to tell him that it had a tail light with a blown bulb. He was pulled over by a local police officer, who of course asked for license and registration and proof of insurance.
I spent a lot of time on the road at that point and the glove box was in disarray and there were copious amounts of toll and parking receipts in the glove box and in a very handy pocket on the driver’s visor.
Stew grew increasingly frustrated trying to find the documents and said, “Officer, could you shine your light in here, please?” The officer was willing to help, but the task must have seemed impossible to my orderly husband, who finally grabbed a handful of toll receipts from the visor and said, “Officer this is my wife’s car. Would you look at this mess! Could you find anything in here?”
The cop laughed, said his wife’s car was the same. He gave a warning with my name on it and the admonition that I had to get the light fixed and take the receipt and my registration and insurance card to the police station the next day.
#1185
I was 20, late for an exam at school, and speeding ridiculously on the perilous tortuous Lakeshore Drive, which edged Lake Eustis. Anyway, the cop was headed the other way when I flew by, and there were a slew of cars behind the both of us. He threw his lights and siren on, and I knew he had me dead to rights.
What did I do? Dutifully pulled over into the orange grove on the side of the road and waited for him. After a few minutes he showed up, sauntered over laughing, and said, “I’m not going to give you a ticket, because if you’d kept going I would never have found you. Don’t do it again. Have a nice day.”
I’ll never forget the happy, nice cop who taught a kid a lesson.
#1186
I got pulled over by a State Trooper last summer on the Maine Turnpike. He came over, asked me how fast I thought I’d been going. I said, “Gee, I had the cruise control on…umm…74?”
He said, “Cruise control? What kind you got? There’s digital and then there’s analog.” At which point he was leaning into my car and checking it out. He pulled his head back out and said, “Oh yeah, that’s an analog. They’re tricky, not accurate enough. See, you’ll get going too fast rolling down hills and all…Here’s what you do. Set it at, oh, 72. That way you’ll leave a little room for yourself.”
The speed limit on the Maine Turnpike is 65, so here he was, giving me a pointer on how to speed safely. With that, he gave me a verbal warning and sent me on my way.
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